On His Wings

Been delving into trivia again. It is amazing how it happens. One question leads to another and before you know it, you know which two animals have been used -far, far more than any others- as national and family symbols throughout the ages and throughout the world. Any guesses? Here they are, in no particular order- the lion and the eagle. It was the eagle that led me to this bit of trivia. And so I also noted that one particular species of eagle, namely the majestic golden eagle, is the most widely heralded of all the chosen eagle species. I found out that its habitat stretches across the whole of the northern hemisphere and so it has a prominent position in the history, religion, and folklore of countries from Mongolia to Mexico to Indonesia to Canada to Egypt.

Now you might wonder what exploring the webs store of knowledge on the golden eagle has to do with my current study of the Old Testament. If you've read my blog on Noah, you might recall I quoted a scripture from the Book of Isaiah, which included this: But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles…. (Isaiah 40:31) (See "Through the Storm)

That quote was indeed the inspiration for this little foray into wildlife -that, and the life of Joseph of Egypt. It was the word "wait" that particularly caught my notice this time. It comes from the same root as the Hebrew words for "hope" and "obedience." It literally means "to bind together" and indicates the patience needed to bind or weave something together. If ever there was an example of someone "waiting" on the Lord, it was Joseph. And if ever there was an example of someone who mounted up as with "wings as eagles," it was also Joseph. In a way, Joseph's story gives us an eagle's eye perspective of life, and the way the Lord works with and teaches his children.

Joseph is the one of the few Old Testament characters whose impression, in my eyes, improved the first time I read the Old Testament for myself. I remember in my primary class, knowing that what is brothers did when they sold him into slavery was a bad, bad thing, but I couldn't help but sympathize with them being jealous of Joseph when Jacob favored him and Joseph bragged about his dreams (he claimed came from God) of becoming a leader over them. Even if he did have those dreams, did he have to share it! I come from a family of eight children- I understand sibling rivalry.

However, after reading Genesis for myself, I quickly realized that was only half the story. Jacob didn't arbitrarily choose Joseph as his favorite. Jacob's favoring Joseph had a great deal to do with trust, and knowing that in Joseph he had a son who would work with him in faithfully following the Lord. Genesis 34, 37 & 38 seem to be pointed efforts on the part of the author of Genesis to give us some idea of why Joseph's desire to seek after and follow the Lord, as well as how he faithfully obey his father, made him Jacob's favored son. I do not deny Jacob's imperfect humanity, but I think his favor for Joseph is a type of what Nephi, in the Book of Mormon, tried to teach his brothers about who is favored of the Lord:  Behold, the Lord esteemeth all flesh in one; he that is righteous is favored of God. (1 Nephi 17:35)

All the other sons, who by birth may have had a prior claim to this type of favor and claim of leadership, had quit simply blown it - in big, messy, decidedly wicked, complicated ways. Their actions towards Joseph only emphasize how unrepentant they were at that point. Perhaps Jacob's words "Ye have troubled me to make me to stink among the inhabitants of the land," says it best. (Genesis 34:30)

So here is Joseph, young and maybe even feeling a little fallen-man pride about the righteous choices he has made. Not perfect, but good and striving to do his best. One day he is the favored son of a rather powerful nomadic leader, and the next he is beaten by those he thought he would lead, thrown into a pit, and later sold as a slave to a passing caravan. It is easy for us, because reading the whole account takes only a few minutes, to see how he became so much more, had so much more, was able to serve his family and father so much more, because of that fateful day. But when he was roped, driven like a beast to market, and sold, and then spent years as a slave and prisoner, he could not see that.

Yet, in the first verses describing his life as a slave and prisoner, it tells us "the Lord was with Joseph."(Genesis 39:2, 21) That is a very significant phrase because the Lord has taken great pains (as I've noted before) to make clear to us the importance of agency and that he will not force himself on us. For instance:

Behold I stand at the door, and knock, if any man hear my voice and open the door, I will come in to him and will sup with him, and he with me. (Revelation 3:20)

Or:     Draw nigh to God, and he will draw nigh to you. (James 4:8)
Or:

Learn to pray. Pray often. Pray in your mind, in your heart. Pray on your knees. Prayer is your personal key to heaven. The lock is on your side of the veil. And I have learned to conclude all my prayers with “Thy will be done.” (Matthew 6:10; see also Luke 11:2; 3 Nephi 13:10). (Boyd K. Packer, “Prayer and Promptings,” Ensign, Nov 2009, 43–46)

So that phrase "and the Lord was with Joseph" together with Joseph's own words declaring his devotion and obedience to God, show that the one thing Joseph did do was to continue turning to the Lord for comfort, strength and help as his life took unexpected, unwelcome turns. This is particularly thought provoking when you consider that both his being sold into slavery, and then his being thrown into prison, could be construed as directly resulting from his obedience to the Lord's commands.(Genesis 37:13-14, Genesis 39:9) Perhaps his life lens is summed up best in what he said to his brothers when his brothers when they came to him, after their father's death, worried that Joseph will use his considerable power to get justified revenge, and he tells them,

Am I in the place of God? …Ye thought evil against me; but God meant it unto good, to bring to pass, as it is this day, to save much people alive. (Genesis 50:19-20)

In other words:  God knows best. He has always known best, and what happened was never out of his control. He allowed you to do your evil deed. He prepared a way for it to be a good thing for me, and many others. I'm good and I love having you and your families here. You just worry about making sure you are right with God.

His approach to life and his Heavenly Father, and the result of that approach, seems to be a perfect example of the perspective the Lord tried to illustrate for the wandering, often angry and bitter, children of Israel. I found this previously underappreciated gem by following the footnotes from, (can you guess) Isaiah 40:31. It too, uses the example of eagles to illustrate the way the Lord lifts and teaches his children. But this time it compares His efforts to teach the children of Israel with the efforts of an eagle to teach her young to fly.

As an eagle stirreth up her nest, fluttereth over her young, spreadeth abroad her wings, taketh them, beareth them on her wings: So the Lord alone did lead him, and there was no strange god with him. (Deuteronomy 32:11)

This is what led me to the golden eagle. I wanted to know what type of bird would most likely have been the "eagle" spoken of here. The golden eagle was well known to the children of Israel. The plains of Goshen and the Sinai wilderness are both natural habitats. Culturally, it was revered as a messenger of the Horus and Isis, the chief Egyptian deities. So the Lord is giving a powerful reminder that He, and He alone is the only true God. And he is also answering one of Israel's most repeated and pressing concerns:

Why, if God is really with us, do we go from being majestically led out of Egypt one day to being hungry and thirsty in the wilderness the next? Why if he has such power doesn't he use it, but instead leaves us to struggle with such painful problems? "Is the Lord among us or not?" (Exodus 16:7)

I found the Lord's illustrative example to be incredibly powerful.  You see, the golden eagle is a devoted parent. It mates for life. The mated pair claims a territory of up to 60 miles in diameter, and, carefully builds a nest. The nest is made of woven branches, sometimes small rocks or other hard materials, and then, in preparation for the young, covered in comfortable, soft material- leaves, moss, even their own feathers. For the first six to eight weeks the eaglets grow rapidly in their comfy home, being fed the choicest bits of meat. And then they fledge- or grow the wings they will need to fly, and things begin to change.

Apparently flying is not an instinctive behavior for the eagles. There are recorded cases of golden eagle eggs being successfully hatched by brooding hens. Without intervention, the eaglet will grow up to act like a chicken, pecking at the ground, living on insects, and never thinking to use his powerful wings to soar. However, the eagle parent knows that eagles are meant to fly- and that means gaining muscle and leaving the comfort of the nest. Most eaglets do not take the initiative, but need firm encouragement to realize their potential to soar.

Just as the verse above describes, this encouragement can include the mother flapping her wings close to the fledglings. This shows them how it is done, and the fledgling has only to make a weak attempt to flap his own wings to get his first taste of flight, courtesy of the draft created by the mother's powerful wings. Mother eagles have also been observed literally "stirring up the nest", taking away the soft moss, leaves or feathers that made it such a comfy place to stay. Wise eagle parents also stop bringing the fledglings choice bits of meat, instead inviting the fledgling to leave the nest and dine with them on a nearby ledge or branch. This is an offer most fledglings refuse at first. They scream their outrage- but to no avail, and eventually they learn they are ready to leave the nest. Now it is time to learn to fly. And it is true- golden eagles have been observed "spread(ing) abroad her wings" to help support their young in learning to fly. However, as is evident in the quote below, the fledglings were no more keen about being dropped off the ledge and spreading their wings, than they were about leaving the nest.

Last summer while my father and I were extracting honey at the apiary about a mile southeast of Thacher School, Ojai, California, we noticed a golden eagle teaching its young one to fly. It was about ten o'clock. The mother started from the nest in the crags, and roughly handling the young one, she allowed him to drop, I should say, about ninety feet, then she would swoop down under him, wings spread, and he would alight on her back. She would soar to the top of the range with him and repeat the process. One time she waited perhaps fifteen minutes between flights. I should say the farthest she let him fall was 150 feet.


My father and I watched this, spellbound, for over an hour. I do not know whether the young one gained confidence by this method or not. A few days later father and I rode to the cliff and out on Overhanging Rock. The eagle's nest was empty. (Dr. Loye Miller (1918) published the following account, as given to him by one of his students: Miss F.E. Shuman) http://www.birdsbybent.com/ch61-70/goleagle.html)

To watch an eagle's flight is truly a thrill to the soul! Just imagine what a truly great tragedy it would be if the mother eagle, knowing the capabilities inherent in her offspring, gave way to their screeches and let them comfortably waste their lives as fat, dependent, flightless parasites. Perhaps, with that in mind, we can begin to see the purpose in the Lord's allowing us to experience strengthening and growing opportunities, even when those opportunities cause us to cry out in pain and fear. The purpose is not our suffering- it is to give us the chance to know the meaning of soaring. But, it requires something of us. It requires that in that moment when we feel proverbially dropped off a cliff, as Joseph must have, we turn to Him in trust that His outstretched wings will be there, to give us the lift we are well aware we are too weak to give ourselves. He will always be there for us, just as He was with Joseph -if we will allow it.

Wrestling

I've written before about being directionally challenged and my propensity to get lost. It has been one of my greatest challenges because job changes have meant a move every few years for our family. A new place meant trying to find my way to church, schools for the kids, doctors and dentists, libraries, visiting teaching routes, and so on and so on. Now, mind you, having learned early on - long before the kids came along - that I had this penchant, I learned to obtain directions when going to a new destination. The preparation paid off, and getting a GPS device for Christmas one year, well it made this last move a whole lot easier. But in hindsight, I am grateful for the experience of occasionally getting lost because it has become a "personal parable" for me. (See "Of Babies and Birds" or "Personal Parables")

You see, there was always a moment when I would begin to suspect I was no longer headed in the right direction. A niggling wrestling within myself that I'd somehow gotten off course and that if I truly desired to get my appointed destination, I'd have to stop, make changes, and get back on course. I have a particular memory of wrestling with that feeling. It was the second time I had gone to this particular location, so I knew the name of the street I had missed and knew the name of some of the streets that intersected with that street. I was in the process of turning around when I saw a cross street by the same name as a cross street that intersected with the road I was to turn on to. I reasoned that this was the same street and would take me back on course. I reasoned it would be quicker and easier, and managed to convince myself. The truth was that I was near the edge of two townships- both which had streets of that particular name- but this one, rather than connecting into the cross street I desired, actually turned and headed in an entirely new direction. It took a while for me to give in to the growing wrestling that my assumption had been wrong, and then I had to back track even further to get back on course. I found out later, from the very person who had given me the directions, that there was only one road that led from where I got lost back to the crossroad I desired- and I turned off it when I tried to take the "shortcut."

This became a "personal parable" for me as I explored how the Lord describes our lives as a journey in which we have the choice to follow his directions in order to be able to get on and stay on His path, if we desire the eternally "good end" He promises. The word for "righteousness" used in the Old Testament literally means "to walk the path uprightly," whereas the word most frequently translated as "wickedness" literally means "to step off the path." "Repent" means "to turn" and is always coupled with the idea of returning to the path. Even the word "punish" is related. It means "to turn the head," meaning that the Lord allows circumstances sufficient to encourage a person to reconsider the path they are on- to see that what they have put their faith in will fail; end in a dead end- and consider getting on the only eternally profitable path.

All these words, and many others, convey that finding and staying on the correct path takes some diligent work on our part. In life, as in my own "personal parable," desiring to get to a certain location is not enough. Reasoning out my own directions, while disregarding those given by someone who actually knew the area led to a substantial waste of time, gas, and irritated, frustrated energy. How much more is wasted when we disregard the Lord's instruction!

I had this "personal parable" fresh in my mind when I came to the Book of Enos in the Book of Mormon. It caused me to more deeply consider what Enos meant when he said he "would tell you of the wrestle which I had before God." The first thing he notes, is that he recognizes his need to repent, to heed the words his father spoke of Jesus Christ, and turn to the Lord. Interestingly, it doesn't stop there. Once Enos knows he is no longer lost, he "began to be filled with a desire for his brethren." Enos life then became about loving and serving not only those he formely thought of as his brethren, but all of God's children, including those who considered themselves his enemies.

There is a footnote to the word "wrestle" in Enos 1 which refers to the Old Testament section on Jacob. Cross referencing Enos's and Jacob's experiences taught me so much. Both reached a point they desired to know and serve God. Both made mistakes in their lives, but committed to follow the Lords plan. Both are promised their works will bless not only their families, but untold future generations. And both record that it was not easy, but with the Lord's help they were able. The connection between the two is particularly intriguing when I saw the word "Israel" broken down into its two roots which individually mean "he wrestles or prevails" and "strength and power." The second root, "El," is often translated as "God." And so Israel translates to "God overcomes, " "God prevails," or "He who overcomes or prevails through the strength and power of God." The last translation seems to carry with it the heart of the promise of the Gospel of Jesus Christ:

For whatsover is born of God overcometh the world; and the victory that overcometh the world, even our faith. Who is he that overcometh the world, but he that believeth that Jesus is the Son of God. (1 John 5:4-5)

To him that overcometh will I grant to sit with me in my throne; even as I also overcame, and am set down with my Father in his throne. He that hath an ear, let him hear what the Spirit saith unto the churches. (Revelations 3:21-22)

These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation; but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world. (John 16:23)

So, what does it mean to "overcome." I think Jacob received profound insight to that the night he dreamed of the ladder into heaven. (Genesis 28:12) A ladder would indicate steps that need to me taken incrementally, one by one, constantly upward, to reach your goal. As the prophet Isaiah explains:

Whom shall he teach knowledge? And whom shall he make to understand doctrine? Them that are weaned from the milk, and drawn from the breast. For precept must be upon precept, precept upon precept; line upon line, line upon line; here a little, and there a little." (Isaiah 28:9-10)

I love that scripture because in so few words it not only captures the idea of a step by step learning process, but begins with the idea that we need to be "weaned from milk." In other words we all, no matter where or when we are born, are spiritual infants in relationship to God. Like infants, we have no way to provide the nourishment and growth we need for ourselves. We flounder and spiritually die if we turn away from all the Lord has prepared for us. And so he pleads:(D&C 78:17-19)

Verily, verily, I say unto you ye are little children, and have not as yet understood how great blessings the Father hath in his own hands and prepared for you; and ye cannot bear all things now; nevertheless, be of good cheer, for I will lead you along. The kingdom is your and the blessing thereof are yours, and the riches of eternity are yours.

As a parent, I have considered what advice I would give my almost-legal-adult, going-off-to-college-in-the-fall daughter, about following directions given by someone who really knows the area. I know I would never advise her to make the choice I did in my "personal parable", and in hindsight I can admit it was not wise to ignore the already tried and proven directions. But at the time, it took running into a literal dead end for me to admit my error and start back to the right road. That dead end also has great import to me. When it comes to the more essential, spiritual wrestlings in my life I have come to recognize that the times of deepest inner turmoil have all come at times with 3 elements in common:

1) I had heard the Lord's words and felt a light, a warm pull of recognition- "this is truth; this is good"- deep within my soul.

2) Sometime after hearing those words, I faced circumstances that tested the depth of my conviction. To continue to live my life according to the pull I'd felt, the light it brought, would mean giving up something that seemed important and immediately gratifying now.

3) I wrestle over whether living up to the light was worth the apparent sacrifice.

This is where daily habits of "feasting upon the word of God" and prayer make a huge difference. (2 Nephi 32:3, Joshua 1:8) The word of God is based on the truths of eternity, and as I've written of before, it has a perspective expanding effect. It has been in moments when I am deeply immersed that I have been able to honestly evaluate whatever it is I'm wrestling with, and I have to acknowledge that the choice that seems more immediately appealing now, and makes it tempting for me to consider disregarding the Lord's direction or call, only caters to a very limited, finite, immediate gratification goal. If I raise my eyes and seek for where pursuing immediately gratifying choice will lead, I discover, over and over again it dead ends at some point.

Regrettably, for me, this realization began with actually reaching a dead end, and doing a painful journey turning back and getting on the right path. I am grateful for the loving guidance he offered, even after I so callously disregarded his careful efforts on my behalf. I am grateful for the infinite atonement that made it possible for me to "turn back" and return to the path of the Lord. But, I rejoice even more in all he offers to expand our vision, help us set eternal goals, and make each niggling wrestling deep within our souls a step forward on the right path. That is the divine purpose in this common, oft repeated, mortal experience. As we move "line upon line," step forward upon step forward, the "wrestling" is still part of our growth, but it is not about us being off track, but about the next thing we need to learn to continue journey forward toward becoming what we have the potential to become.

This brings me to another of the very few scripture references which us the term "wrestle" to describe our opportunities for growth. I found it profitable to consider it, because the person who is described as "wrestling" was, at this point in his life, a faithful follower of the Lord who had given up a high political office, and the worldly power and prestige that went with it, so that he could devote his time to sharing the Lord's directions. Obviously his wrestling was not over whether to "step off the path." Rather, he struggled when he prayed for a particular group of people, who were currently taking great pride in their self appointed, dead end path. Alma, having in his youth, openly rebelled against God, and tasted the very "pains of hell," knew what was on the line and experienced great "anguish of soul" over the decisions his brethren. He prayed for a miracle; he prayed that the Lord, "would pour out his Spirit upon the people…that he might baptize them to repentance." (Alma 23:10) The answer, which was essentially a "no", taught me a great deal about how much value the Lord places on agency. Moreover, as Alma listened and then acted upon what he learned as he continued to serve the Lord, what happened to Alma was really incredible.

In Alma 23, Alma is overwhelmed and in anguish over the pain he feels over his brethren. Several chapters later, Alma is again leading a mission to a city that wants nothing to do with the Lord. This time his prayer is different. He acknowledges that the law of agency, and that it means he will not be treated kindly- no matter how sincerely he loves and wants to help his brethren. He does, as always pray for success, to be led to those who are searching for the words of light and truth he brings. But the central focus of this prayer is to ask the Lord to strengthen him that he will be able to overcome or "bear" "afflictions" that might come because of other's choices. Why? Because he knows "their souls are precious." (Alma 31:30-35) By staying true to the path through this process of learning, of wrestling, of overcoming, Alma, like Enos, had become what we are all to become: filled with charity. He followed the directions of the Lord to:

Let thy bowel also be full of charity toward all men, and to the household of faith, and let virtue garnish they thoughts unceasingly; then shall thy confidence wax strong in the presence of God. (Doctrine & Covenants 121:45)

That last bit, "then shall thy confidence wax strong in the presence of God" is illustrated in several of the words from the lives and teachings of these three witnesses and examples, but my favorite cross reference to this scripture are Enos' parting words:

And I rejoice in the day when my mortal shall put on immortality, and shall stand before him; then shall I see his face with pleasure, and he will say unto me Come unto me, ye blessed, there is place prepared for you…(Enos 1:27)

That kind of confidence; that kind of true pleasure- I think it is well worth wrestling for!